It's statistically proven based on the 2003 survey that 6 out of 10 Malaysians are mentally disturbed, in the other words, psycho. That word might sound harsh but if you were to be me yesterday in the KTM (together with your friends, of course. I won't let you go nuts alone!) that is just a metaphor, I'm telling you.
Let's rewind a bit before running to the "psycho" part. My friends and I have been planning of watching "Fast and Furious" in Mid Valley since last week (why Mid Valley? Because Nilai is just about the end of the world, get it?). But since we got our own lives to run, we never had the chance to watch it last week so we bet yesterday would be the perfect time. We dashed into this cab that takes only 4 people in one go - normally - but we insisted a person more. The Pakcik was kinda pissed off the fifth person but still went on til we reached 100 meters more to the KTM station. Turns out there's a check point in the middle of the road so the third person must get out or else the Pakcik will have to pay 300 bucks. And you what's worse? We didn't see it coming and Niro** had to out of the cab along the highway. The highway. Poor thing. He has to walk all the way by himself to the KTM while the Pakcik meanly took 10 bucks for the 5Th person's charge. Justice here. But since we insisted in the first place, it's still our fault.
We got into the train on time the latest train just arrived. Boredom really kills so we were just reading, listening to music and some are chatting about random stuffs. Then suddenly, (oh yeah here goes the "psychotic loser's part") there's this man with a laptop-less, laptop bag sitting after the next aisle bellowing really loudly over the phone like he owns the whole place. Me and Sandy** were laughing our head off, but then he quickly turned to our direction. We shut up for a while and then he started asking us weird questions that are not even related to him bellowing loudly, like "Why don't you let your hair out?" or "Why are you covering? You're limiting your beauty!" and some other crap like that. At first we were just laughing at the fact that he wasn't mad because we mocked him. He turned his head to our direction again, but you can't really see where he's looking exactly 'cause his wearing shades. He kept on bugging and lecturing the people near him about some stuffs I can't get, well, I don't wanna get it, anyway. I'm surprised with the amount of patience the public is giving him. If it was in my country, they would have pop him off his seat like nobody's business. My God, I always have to remind myself that I'm in a different country.
Anyways, he moved on to his trustworthy phone since nobody is giving a damn to whatever he wanna say, clearly. He bellowed loudly over the phone again, but this time we figured out he was just calling people's attention and that he was just pretending to be talking with someone on the other line. What a bloody loser?! And yes, we laughed again with the precautions of not offending him. But this time, he got up about a meter away from us, pointing at Mary's** face:
"You are so black that even if I turn off the lights, I wouldn't see you!". What a statement. Man, he just opened a pocket full of joy and a civil war, too.
Mary: "Excuse me?" Trust me, she got used to this kind of pranks but hey, it's not funny even if, so she tries her best to be polite somehow.
The psychotic loser: "I said, you're a black woman who covers her hair and that you can't be seen in the dark!"
What the eff? HE.IS.NOT.MAKING.ANY.SENSE.PERIOD.
Oh yeah, I know what you're thinking. Lord, I wish it's halal to murder somebody right now. But it's not so wise of us to literally kill him on the spot. I mean, we're underage and then we'll be in prison, our education is at stake, we'll be a shame for UIA, etc. But we can also kill him after outside, though. It's just that finding a hiding place for his body..lying to everyone..hiding from the police and so on, would actually take more than a week to plan. Good grief, I couldn't believe we had more patience than we thought we had that the loser just got a slap of shit out of his face. We were yelling chorus to whatever he say. He screams, we scream. He points, we point. He doesn't make sense, well, that's the difference because we surely do make sense and that's the bottom line of the whole crap. He dances like Barney the purple dinosaur while insulting us thinking we are insulted, whereas actually he is just wearing off the dignity out of himself.
I feel sorry for him...NOT!
He stood near the train door unaware of his death. The mixture of glares and grins of the people on the train seems to be colliding to the conclusion that this man has to leave in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. And he left. Smart of him to think that we no longer love his presence.
Mitch** took a video of it. Oh yes, we love treasuring memories. We concluded his just probably a discouraged public speaker, or his wife left him, or he haven't eaten for months (which is unlikely since he's roundly healthy), or he's drunk (even if it's just 12am)..but the thing is, he calls himself a lawyer. Wow. This requires too much of thinking. Or maybe, just maybe, he's just one of those 6 out of 10 mentally disturbed Malaysians? God knows.
MORAL LESSON:
Never mess up with a man bellowing over the phone. Oh well, what a day.
